It took me a while to think of something ‘indispensable’ to put here. My first thought was friends, or family. Maybe my dogs? They’re pretty damn necessary for functioning.
Man, I am gonna be all kinds of fucked up when they die.
Tiggy’s super grey these days. Limps about, spends her nights staring wistfully off into the dark of the back yard. She can’t run nearly as fast as she used to, but she still loves it. Just plodding around the park with her tongue out. Having a whale of a time. She’s still a puppy in her head. Still rolls around and plays games and manipulates us with her innocent little face when there’s food around.
Anyway here’s some black pens. I’m a writer and a scribbler. I used to tell myself that the whole ‘I write better by hand than on a screen’ thing was just people being romantic about old times, but lately I’ve been writing a lot for uni, and let me tell you: some days, you just need a notebook. You need a canvas you can place down flat on a desk and then physically attack with a pen. Press down hard, carve your words into it, scratch them out even harder. Spread out, write big and write small, write notes on the sides. Re-write words over themselves to make them more legible when you can’t think of the next word. There is no delete key.
Plus you can draw in the margins. I’ve been doing a lot of drawings that incorporate small, circular holes lately. They’re at the edge of my notebooks, and while I don’t feel confident dedicating whole pages to my latest scrawl – paper and concentration are at a higher premium in university than highschool, who knew? – the margins are always a safe place to draw. Twisted faces with hollow eyes, angler fish, triangles and lines.
Writing and drawing are two things I’m always going to do. I can’t not. And outside of a computer, I need a cheap black pen to do both. Blue drawings don’t look anywhere near as cool as black ones, and blue words? Blech! I’ve got a box of 50 cheap black pens from Bic (This is the only product I’ve ever encountered that I genuinely feel happy about endorsing. Fuck yes you should buy this box of cheap pens. It’s fucking spectacular, and yes Bic, you can quote me.)
It’s my second one in three years and I just love them so much you spend $12 on pens one day and you are fucking set forever. I cram them into a little pouch in my backpack in bulk so there’s always a pen in easy reach. Every other, fancier kind of pen is just harder to use or too nice to haul around on the street. OR it jams. Fuck. Goddamn ‘gel pens.’ Are those still a thing? Never worth the trouble. These pens are just straight tubes of plastic. Sometimes I make a little bruise on the edge of my middle finger. Don’t even care. I will wear it as a badge of honour.
I don’t remember what it’s like to run out of black pens, and I don’t want to.
Oh god, I just realised.
‘Indis – PENS – able.’